There's always a blessing....

Thanksgiving Day...most years its easy to come up with a long list of things I am thankful for. This year Thanksgiving is just a week and a half after the passing of my mother-in-law Diane...and with that sorrow prevalent in my mind it takes a little more thought. But there is always a blessing in sorrow...it just takes thoughtful, focused effort to reveal it sometimes.

This year has been a crazy one...I think that makes two in a row for the Paugh family. Last year we went back and forth to Ohio...first for the passing of Grandma Paugh, and then later for the passing of Jamie. This year, just 6 days after the new year, I left my home and family to spend 3 weeks with my brother and sister-in-law, followed by 3 weeks in the hospital before the blessing came....Jolee Esther (named in part after Grandma Paugh and born just short of a year after her home going) was born in February and has been a breath of fresh air every day of her life. We are so thankful for her sweet spirit and she is truly a blessing.

Rich and Diane came out to visit in the spring and were very excited to meet Jolee. It was during that visit that Diane noticed some strange discomfort in her abdomen. Shortly after they returned home she went to the doctor and was diagnosed with a form of liver cancer. Through a roller coaster of doctor visits we learned that Diane would have surgery to remove the cancer. She endured two rounds of chemo and various complications, and the surgery was postponed several times. In June I took Jolee to visit with Courtney in Florida and while there we learned that my Grandma also had cancer that had spread from her colon throughout her abdomen including her bones and liver. She was not given long to live, so Courtney and I made the quick decision to drive down to visit her for a week. It was one of the best visits I've ever had with my Grandma. She was alert, sharp, and in a pleasant mood. She was in a really nice hospice and the whole trip was spent sitting by her side, talking, praying, laughing... She was able to meet and enjoy Jolee. She called her "the calm one." I learned a lot about my grandma on that trip and have many special memories that I will never forget. She passed away in September and I am so thankful for the time I had to know her, love her, and appreciate her.

Andy and I decided that we should spend some time in Ohio with his parents while we had the time during the summer. No one knew what the diagnosis for Diane quite meant, so we drove out and spent 3 weeks with them in July. Diane had surgery and they removed the cancer and declared her "cancer free." It seemed as though we were still rejoicing in that declaration when about a month later she was having belly pain. Through another roller coaster of doctor visits we learned that the cancer had returned and had spread. Radiation and surgery were no longer options, and chemo was not an immediate answer because of some other complications. We determined that Andy should go visit again as soon as possible after his soccer season. Andy went to Ohio for a week and had a really good visit with his mom, as well as his dad and siblings. He told me that he spent time reading his Bible to her, praying with her, talking, and simply sitting with her. That is his blessing...I know he is very thankful for that time with her. He returned home on a Tuesday, and by Friday we knew that it was time to go back. Friday evening we hustled around to find plane tickets, pack for us, and pack for the boys to spend the week with my parents. We got one-way tickets as we were unsure what things would be like when we got there. We arrived in Ohio on Saturday at 4:30pm...we spent the afternoon and evening with Diane. She was able to see and recognize Jolee as well. When we first stepped into her room, although it was difficult she smiled and said Jolee's name. She stepped into the presence of our Savior about 12 hours after we arrived. We are so thankful that we made it in time to see her again, and to be with the family during those first hours of mourning. We were blessed with those 12 hours and the time that followed with family.

And through it all you can spot little moments of blessing. And the blessing continues in the midst of sorrow. I was blessed to have a mother-in-law who believed in Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. Just yesterday my son came into the living room with sorrow written all over his face. I asked him what was wrong and he replied, "Mom, don't you know I'm always sad that Grandma died?" And in that moment, it was my privilege, my pleasure, to pull him up in my lap, kiss away his sadness, and tell him all about the glory his Grandma was now experiencing in the presence of Jesus. We talked about heaven and Grandma's new body...free from cancer, free from sickness, free from pain. And we talked about how happy, how joyful we can be for her even as we miss her. That is the gift she left behind, and that is the joy of knowing Jesus.

1 Corinthians 16: 54b, 55
Death has been swallowed up in victory. Where O death is your victory? Where O death, is your sting?

Funny

So, this may come across as a little insensitive, but I just couldn't resist. Luke was sick for awhile last week. Please note that when I took this picture, Luke was not actually throwing up...nor was it staged. It is just him being VERY dramatic and VERY friendly with the toilet. Ha, still makes me laugh.

Sweet

Sorry to post so many pics, but I just can't keep the cuteness all to myself! Doesn't she just make you smile!!!???!!!

Events

So the last week has been filled with lots of events. Locally we've had a lock-down at one school due to a suicidal man nearby. It turned out well with no injuries to anyone. Also we've had a large fire burning within 5 miles of our church and many homes. I believe its burned about 530 acres so far and is about 40% contained. But after nearly a month with no moisture around here, we've had two cool nights with downpours...a gift from God if you ask me.
Last Sunday was supposed to be my first time teaching Children's Church...but unfortunately Luke and I both got pretty sick over the weekend. Andy, although understandably hesitant, filled in, took Brady, and did the class himself! We are supposed to teach for a month. Its a new experience for both of us.

On Monday when Brady woke up from his nap he complained of not feeling too well. Sure enough he was burning up. Luke was feeling better by now, but I was feeling worse. I kept Brady home on Tuesday and sent Luke to school. It was a nice day of laying around and watching cartoons...but miserable with fevers and sore throats. We were so miserable on Tuesday night that I knew we had to get to the doctor. I debated in my head for a long time about what to do...should I make and appointment for myself? With no insurance....pay a hundred bucks and risk simply being told to wait it out? Or I could wait and see what they did with Brady, then make an appointment for me? Beg for medicine for myself if they gave him some? I finally decided that was too sneaky. I would make the appointment for Brady and just tough it out myself. I did pray and ask God if there was a way to provide for me, that he would do it or help me through this sickness without.
So, I picked up Luke from school and took him up to Andy to spend lunchtime with him at his school while I took Brady to the doctor. Turns out Brady has an ear infection in one ear. Then the doctor looks at me and says, "Does anyone else in the family have a sore throat?" I replied that Luke had one over the weekend but seemed better, and also that I had one. He said, "Well, if you don't mind, I'd like to test Brady for strep. Then if its positive we can just go ahead and treat the whole family." I'm sure my eyebrows raised in surprise. Poor Brady suffered through the test...swabbing the back of his throat. He hated it and we had to pin him down...poor guy. But he toughed it out and the test came back....positive. So we all (Luke, Brady, and myself) were given prescriptions and sent on our way. I am sooooo thankful to the doctor for giving us all medicine and truly caring for our entire family. And thankful to God for answering my prayer! I didn't have to beg or even ask...the doctor brought it up himself. How cool. And by the way, Andy called in the next day after feeling the same symptoms. So now the strep count in our house is up to 4. I'm keeping an eye on Jolee but so far she seems to have a runny nose (what baby doesn't?) and otherwise seems fine. The doctor said breastfed babies hardly ever get strep. Here's hoping and praying that that info holds true for her!
So....here we are to Friday. We've been on antibiotics for over 24 hours so I'm hoping the boys feel well enough to attend Awana tonight. Brady has been working sooooo hard on his verses...learning 2 or 3 per week. I'd hate for him to miss and kill his momentum. Luke is doing well also...although is decidedly more stubborn. Practicing verses with him goes something like this:
Me: Luke, what is your verse?
Luke: Nothing.
Me: God is love. Luke, what is your verse?
Luke: Nothing.
Me: Come on, I know you can do it. God is Love. What is your verse?
Luke: Nothing.
Me: Fine. (and I move on to other things....)
*****Several minutes later*********
Luke: (talking to himself almost mockingly...if he knew how to mock) What is your verse? God is Love. What is your verse? God is Love.

I have quickly come to the conclusion that Luke will always have to attend school...I might be able to home school the others, but not this guy. I'd be in the loony bin way before my time.

Saturday is also Brady's last day of soccer for the season. I'm sad about that, and I know he is too. However, our perfect fall weather is quickly turning cold...so its about time. I hope he feels well enough to play his best. Its so fun to watch. Afterwards we are having a team party, so it should (should....) be a fun day. However Andy will be away with his soccer team so I'm hoping that Papa and Nana are coming for support. :)

And last but not least, I should update on Jolee. She is changing quickly these days. She can now sit up by herself...although I still put pillows around her for the occasional nose dive. She is also getting up on her hands and knees by herself and doing the pre-crawl rocking motion. Its pretty neat to watch and its exciting to see her develop. I'm sure it won't be long until she is following me around the house...scary. The house then becomes a scary place to be with two older brothers around. We are working on keeping their toys downstairs, bathroom doors closed, the gate to the stairs closed....etc. etc. It will be interesting! Her favorite thing to do right now is growl....she sounds like a mini tiger...it is pretty funny.

Oh, and Brady is having a "reading explosion" right now. We worked on phonics stuff yesterday and he sounded out about 40 words. He definitely feels the excitement of learning. He also practiced writing his numbers. I just told him to write as many as he knew....he went all the way to 100 with only a couple mistakes...which he recognized himself!
Okay, I hear my little tiger so its time to go!

Glory

Grandma with her flowers and "Brady Bear"

Four generations! (Never mind that Jolee is the size of Brady Bear!)

She was so happy to see Jolee. She called her the "quiet one" :)

"When we all

get to heaven,

what a day of rejoicing that will be!

When we all

see Jesus,

we'll sing and shout the victory!"

My Grandma began rejoicing in Heaven with Jesus last week. Its so hard to think that she isn't here anymore...but I know where she is...and she is having a grand time there, reunited with Grandpa, and enjoying the presence of her Savior!

In her last days she told my mom she was bored...she was content with this life...she was ready to go. What a blessed place to be. I mean, as Christians we say we are ready to meet Jesus. But really? If the truth were told aren't there so many things we really want to experience and do and live out before we meet Jesus? Grandma was at a place where she was truly, honestly ready to meet Him. Wow! When I think about that, it is so comforting, so peaceful, so....just the way it should be.

I don't have many memories of Grandma from when I was little...we didn't get to visit much because it was just too far away. But the times we did go visit I remember as being very special. Its just a feeling that I remember more than actual memories. I do remember spending the night at Grandpa and Grandma's once...it stands out in my mind because it was so stinkin' hot and humid! Everything felt wet. The change from Colorado to Florida was a bit extreme! I remember trying to go to sleep and I kept kicking my covers off...and Grandma would always know and she would come in and gruffly tell me I had to at least have a sheet on or I would catch cold. In my little girl mind I thought she was nuts! Catch cold? How could anyone catch a cold when it was so hot? There couldn't be any colds in Florida because it was hot all the time. :)

Another time we stayed with them I remember tickling Grandma's feet just to be funny...whoops! I found out real quick that NO ONE...EVER...TOUCHES GRANDMA's FEET!!! She had the most sensitive feet of anyone I've ever known. I think she knew if you were just thinking about touching her feet.

When I was little Grandma had an orange lava lamp that she would put by the bed and I would fall asleep watching the glow of those orange globs as they traveled up and down. To this day I still love watching lava lamps.

Once I went swimming in the canal behind their house...it was all fun and games until I kicked a big ole fish with my foot. I came up screaming and climbed out as fast as I could. I can still picture my Grandpa chuckling in his quiet little way...with his shoulders bobbing up and down. I think that was the last time I went swimming in the canal.

Grandpa used to make us sausage sandwiches for breakfast...I can remember waking up to the sounds and smells of sausage in the frying pan. He would almost always be sitting at the little round table in the kitchen...the one where we played marbles on his homemade game board. If he wasn't at the table, he was puttering around in the garage making something. The scent of sawdust still reminds me of him. And if not in the garage, then he was playing his guitar and praising the Lord. We would all gather around and beg him to play the Noah song.

The first time Andy met my Grandma was very memorable! Grandma had a stroke and she had been in rehab for awhile. We were the ones who got to pick her up to take her home. We were told to come late morning to get her. Well, we arrived somewhere around 10 am. Apparently the feisty lady had been up and ready for quite sometime. She ranted on and on about how we were just going to leave her there to rot. Poor Andy was a little surprised, but we reassured her we would never forget her and got her out to the car. Well, Andy was driving cautiously so he wouldn't upset her anymore...we stopped at the light, then he slowly pulled out to make the left hand turn when the light turned green. Grandma pounded on the back of his seat and screamed, "Go man, Go! You trying to kill me? Go man, Go!" Ahhh, this still makes me laugh. Partly because Grandma was so feisty that day, and partly because I don't think anyone has EVER accused Andy of driving too cautiously. It was a good laugh!

More recently...I went to visit Grandpa and Grandma and Aunt Rachel in their new house. Brady was just a few months old. I hadn't seen them interact much in the later years...mostly because illness had come to separate them. But on this visit, Grandma graciously gave up her room and stayed in Grandpa's room. We had all gone to bed, and I was laying awake when I heard a commotion outside my bedroom door. I opened it up to find Grandpa and Grandma both in the hall. I asked them what was going on and Grandpa told me a cockroach had run out of their room and down the hall. He had trouble walking and really couldn't bend down because of the swelling in his bad leg. He wanted me to squish the cockroach...I told him he was nuts! That thing was the size of a mouse! Somehow poor Grandpa managed to bend down enough to squish it with his shoe while I was squealing and covering my mouth with my hands. I think I ran all the way down the hallway...I admit, I freaked out. I can still hear the crunch. He asked me to clean it up and I told him straight out that Aunt Rachel would have to do it in the morning! After all the excitement we all went back to bed...but I could hear Grandpa and Grandma giggling together long after the lights were turned out. They thoroughly enjoyed my disgust! Anytime I mentioned the cockroach later, Grandma would burst out laughing.

After Grandpa passed away, I actually got to see Grandma a lot more. She was well enough to travel quite a bit and Aunt Rachel did a great job of taking her out. They came up to Ohio for Brady's first birthday party and since then I was blessed to develop a close relationship with my Grandma. In fact, not only me, but Brady developed a special relationship with his GG as well. I am so thankful for that, and I hope that he will remember her as he grows up. He played balloons with her at his first birthday...he loved her from the start and was never startled or afraid of her. Grandma had a gruff side to her...but it was a side that I loved. It always made me chuckle because I knew the sweetness that was inside. Last November Brady made it his job to walk GG down to her room, help her get into bed, and tuck her in. He talked to her on the phone, sang to her, and even took his first plane ride down to Florida to visit with her this summer. She was bedridden then, and he took his favorite book "Roar of a Snore" with him and read to her in bed. The last time he talked to her on the phone, he sang to her the song he learned in kindergarten. "You sing a song and I'll sing a song, and we'll sing a song together. You sing a song, and I'll sing a song in warm or wintry weather."

I was able to visit her in June after we learned of her diagnosis. She met Jolee...and she told me she had prayed every day for us both throughout the pregnancy. I was sitting by her in the hospice when she sang "Happy Birthday" to Brady for his 5th birthday over the phone. I gave her a stuffed bear that she held onto until her last day...she called it her "Brady Bear". I am so thankful to have spent that week with her. I would sit and hold her hand and listen to her talk, or watch her sleep, and pray for her comfort. Those quiet moments were such a blessing to me and I will truly miss her. I look forward to the day when we can join her in Glory.

Torture...pure torture.

Our new playground, thanks to some generous friends!

Jolee at 7 months!

Sleeping beauty...

Luke's first day of preschool...he looks scared, doesn't he? Ha!

Torture...pure torture! Okay okay, I'm kidding. Sort of. This morning I sent Luke off with his dad to school, where he would be put on the bus...yes, the bus...to travel the short distance from the middle school to the elementary for preschool. No biggie, right? Except he is 3! Well, no biggie for Luke apparently, but mom was a bit of a nervous mess this morning. Yeah, I'm talking about me. I'm told that Luke jumped right on the bus and followed his girl....friend....to a seat and off he went. I'm glad it went well and it saves me a lot of driving, but man that felt like torture to my heart!

Next, I finished getting Brady ready for school and he tells me he wants to ride the bus. (if Luke isn't scared, Brady decides he can be a bit more brave too!). Okay, so we put Jolee in the stroller and walk on down to the bus stop where Brady gets on the bus and off he goes! Yahoo! Two kids off to school and I haven't used any gas or spent an hour on the road! All good things...will somebody please tell my heart that!?!

Kindergarten and Soccer

Cheering for a goal...

Lining up for school!

Playground time before the bell.

All set...

Just a bit goofy :)
So many new things this past week! Brady was off to his first day of kindergarten...pretty brave little guy. And soccer! This morning was his first two games...oh and it was so much fun to watch! He is getting better and better with each passing minute of play. He loves it. We've talked a bit about always doing our best for God's glory...and he is out there working hard. I'm so proud! He is getting more and more aggressive and he scored two goals in the second game! It was a beautiful day for soccer and I can't wait for more!

Forgetting the most important thing....

I learned a lesson this morning...from my 5-year-old...one I used to know when I was 5...and somewhere along the complexity of life, it got lost in the shuffle.

We have satellite TV. One show that the boys love to watch is called Bigfoot (its with talking monster trucks). Very often the channel that it is on doesn't work for some reason. I flipped to that channel this morning and of course, it didn't work.

Brady said, "This one always does that!"
I said, "I know, I don't know why."
Brady looked at me and said, "We always forget to pray about that!"
I thought for a second...surprised a little. Then said, "Pray about the channel? Do you want to?" (It took me a second because who in their adult life thinks to pray about a TV channel?)
Brady said sure, and he began to pray. It came out something like this....

"Dear Jesus, thank you for Mommy and Daddy. Please help the TV to work, and all the channels to work. The one that we want to watch....the bad ones that Mommy and Daddy want to watch...and all the channels. Amen."

Ahhhh simple faith. So sweet and refreshing, isn't it? And by the way, if you are still laughing...as I am...about the "bad ones that Mommy and Daddy want to watch"....let me explain. Andy and I usually try to watch a movie during nap time since we are too sleepy at night. Sometimes the kids wake up before its over, and we say we are watching an adult movie and they have to do something else until its over. Of course, my 5-year-old is more inquisitive than that and asked more questions about why he can't watch. So (I'm still laughing...) I said that we always want to put good things in our minds and not bad things...translated we want to watch good things and not bad things. This was acceptable to him and completely made sense now that Mommy and Daddy watch "bad" things. Hahahahahahhaha. Oh I dug myself a hole, didn't I!

I don't know if God really cares about the TV channel...but I KNOW He cares about the little boy whose first thought was to pray. Lesson learned.

So many more stories to tell about the first few days of kindergarten...but we have to hustle now to get ready for Brady's first soccer game!!!! I'm proud to be a soccer mom!

Anyone out there?

Cute baby

My hiker!

Yahoo for 6 months!

Do you think there are any fish out there?

Brady's 1st solo ride!

Oh my. It has been quite awhile since I've been on here...I'm wondering if anyone has actually stuck with me and continues to check my blog. Probably not. Well here is an update for my benefit I guess! :)

Jolee is now a precious little bundle at 6 months old. She is still a smiler, still sleeps extraordinarily well, and is all of just over 12 pounds. She has actually outgrown a few 0-3 month clothes, but not many. The few 3-6 month things I've put her in look rather large on her! Its hard to believe. She rolls really quickly now from her back to her stomach. She can fit 4 toes into her mouth. She likes standing in the walker, but tires quickly. I just got out the high chair and cleaned it up...getting ready for the start of a new phase of feeding. She loves to be held and snuggled and tickled. She is growing bored of laying down and is starting to scoot on her back....she pushes with her feet and gets her hips up so she slides head first across the floor. So much for the little bit of hair that was beginning to grow back over her bald spot!

We just returned from a 4 day camping trip that was just....well, incredible! My parents went with us, and our friend J joined us for a day. We spent the days hiking, biking, fishing, kayaking, watching a brilliant star-filled sky for the meteor shower, swimming, walking, roasting hot dogs and marshmallows.....all the good stuff. It was a great little getaway before Andy started back to school. Here are a few highlights...On one hike we had to stop for a few minutes because a moose was a little to close to the path for comfort. At one point we stopped along the edge of a river/waterfall to take pictures...my mom slipped on a rock and we got a pic of her IN the river instead of next to it! On one kayak trip across the lake, the wind picked up really strong...creating white caps on the water. I was on shore and looked up to see both kayaks overturned...I could only see 4 heads bobbing up and down and the sound of Luke screaming. It was nerve-wracking to be on shore and not be able to help. Andy was able to toss Luke back into the kayak and swim to shore. J and Brady hung on to their boat which was barely bobbing above the water. They all made it back safely, but it was so stressful for me to watch that I had to go for a walk after to calm down. Praise God for His protection! One clear night we were told there was supposed to be a meteor shower...we all sat around the campfire and talked and watched the sky. It was awesome.

And now...we are trying to adjust to Andy being back at school...all day...with soccer practice after. Its a long day for us all. Andy is excited about his first season as a high school coach. I know he loves to be outside playing soccer. Next week Brady starts school...I'm still wrestling with that, but we've decided to send him for a half day instead of a full day of kindergarten. He is also supposed to start his first team sport this week...his soccer shoes, socks, and shin guards are ready and waiting. I can't wait to watch him learn how to play, to be on a team, and to interact in an event without us. He is growing up so fast...its great, and I hate it at the same time. I cheer his independence and accomplishments, and quietly loathe having to let him go. Something tells me I better get used to it.

Moment by Moment

Wow. I guess this is harder to keep up during the summer! I'm just going in so many directions that sitting down to blog is not at the top of my list! Sorry to those who aren't getting updated!

Jolee is nearly 5 months old now...and I feel like I'm finally starting to come out of a fog. I'm getting more sleep now and getting more used to taking care of 3 kids, and my muscles are slowly...ever so slowly...getting back to a mild out-of-shape form. I would never say that I'm "in shape", but at least I can move around pretty normally now...and I've even been jogging a few times! Jolee can roll to her belly and is at that awkward stage where she gets stuck and frustrated. She is starting to be able to hang on to small toys, or sometimes her binkie. She can pull it out of her mouth, but not get it back in...also frustrating for her! She is a beautiful baby with the easiest disposition I've ever seen. She puts herself to sleep and prefers to go to bed at 8:30 sharp! She sleeps through the night until around 7 am. She smiles all the time and is starting to really "talk". She is such a joy.

Brady and Luke have really enjoyed "camping" in Grandma and Grandpa's backyard. They have been swimming so much that they both got swimmer's ear...miserable! Its getting better but Luke went two nights where he pretty much screamed all night. Thankfully Brady and Jolee slept through it all...Andy and I weren't so lucky.

Andy's mom went to the hospital today and will be there through the surgery scheduled for Tuesday. Thankfully everything is still on track for that to happen.

I'm am enjoying all the benefits of summer...but even as I write this there is a twinge of sadness knowing that it is quickly fleeting...and Brady will start school in just one short month. Yikes! I am just genuinely going to miss him when he goes.

There is much more I could write about but I just feel mentally/emotionally exhausted. Between saying a final goodbye to my grandma and waiting for Andy's mom to have her surgery, I'm just a bit tapped out. I'm enjoying being surrounded by family...and just trying to slow down enough to enjoy the moments we are in, and not speeding ahead to the next thing.

Traveling...lots of traveling

So I've been in Florida now for nearly a week...visiting my sister...and it has been Oh so nice! I knew this summer would be crazy busy, but now we have a few new things thrown into the mix. We just found out that my grandma, my mom's mom, has been diagnosed with liver cancer as well as bone cancer. At first we thought they were going to do surgery, but I guess now they have moved her to hospice care and given her up to 3 months to live. She lives in Florida, but still about 7 hours away from where we are. Courtney, her 2 kids plus Jolee and I are all about to embark on a drive down to visit Grandma for what will probably be the last time. My mom is flying in as well. For all my prayer warriors out there...please pray for our travels, for health and strength for us all, for peace and physical comfort for Grandma, for peace of mind and strength for what is ahead for my mom and aunts. We are so blessed to be able to visit her while she is still doing well. I'm excited to introduce her to our little miracle baby. I'm saddened by the thought of saying goodbye, and that my boys who love their GG so much will probably not see her again on this earth. God is good, He is always faithful. And He has been so gracious in His timing and is allowing us to go visit. I am so thankful for that.

So when I return home...just about a week later than planned, it will be a whirlwind. I'll get home, unpack, do the laundry, repack, and head out with the whole family for Ohio. There we plan to visit with family, help Diane through her cancer treatment as much as possible, and work on their house. We are in for a lot of traveling these days. I am thankful that we have the opportunity to do everything we are doing. We will need much prayer as we walk through these difficult days. Thank you all for your love and support.

General Craziness

Memorial weekend...is it over already? Its such a blur...
Andy was away Thursday and Friday as a leader on the sophomore river trip. I'm sure he missed us...haha! I know he had a blast and it was beautiful weather for it. I was busy continuing to get ready for our garage sale and open house. Yes, I did say garage sale AND open house. For those who might be wondering...yes, that is a lot to get ready for! At times I felt a bit crazy, but it all came together. In fact, on Friday I was able to take the kids to see a great college friend of mine who was in Colorado on vacation. It was my first big "trip" with all three kids and no Andy. Thankfully my mom made the drive with me and I dropped her off at the outlet malls. A real treat for her, and a blessing for me. It was so fun to catch up and the boys enjoyed the bike path and playgrounds.
Saturday morning came bright and early as Andy and I scurried around setting up the garage sale while making sure our house stayed in order. I kept sending the boys outside so that I could keep the house clean. We cleared out quite a bit of stuff over two days, and had about 10 people come through the house. I felt like all my work had been validated, so it all was worth it.
On Monday we packed up our stuff for the day and headed to the local parade. It was a classic Grand Lake parade...mostly firetrucks. The boys were thrilled and of course enjoyed the candy. Our next stop was the golf course. The boys have been dying to go, and finally we had time and had nice weather. We spent some time at the driving range and then putted around a bit. Nana and Papa joined us for the parade and golf. It was a fun family time. We went back to mom and dad's for lunch and enjoyed a loaded grilled chicken salad. Yum! We spent the day there and rounded out the evening with a trip to the pool. Jolee behaved in her car seat :) and the boys were able to expend some energy (bonus!). I even got some laps in, and relaxed in the hot tub. What a great, busy, weekend! It was so fun to all be together.

Good times

Luke's 3rd Birthday! He looked through my cupcake book and picked these..."Kung Fu Panda"

Do they look a little bit alike? Two cuties.

Still trying to capture that smile!

Outfit sent from Aunt Janet and Uncle Dave....THANKS! It is so cute on her!

The actual birthday "day"...the suckers were his favorite part!

We did a simple celebration for Luke's birthday and he loved it. No stress on our part...I'll take it! This weekend was chaotic, awesome, relaxing, tiring.....all of the above. Friday night mom and I took Brady and Luke to the rec district's Mom/Son event. It was at the rec center and was so fun (and tiring!). We played in the gymnastics room, tried the climbing wall, went swimming, and had organized games. Unfortunately Dad didn't have as great of a time. The milk we had in the freezer for Jolee apparently wasn't good, and she refused to eat....cried quite a bit and finally fell asleep. Poor girl! Poor daddy!

On Saturday Andy had a home track meet (finally! The first two were cancelled due to snow) We thought about going, but it was really windy and still a bit cold. When he got home, he took the kids, and Mom, Mindy and I took off for the hot springs. We spent a couple hours there and felt so relaxed. It was a fun time for the girls. Andy fared a bit better as Jolee took the fresh milk I had left for her. He even took all 3 kids to the store by himself! What a guy :) He had flowers and cards waiting for me when I got home.

Sunday morning the plan was to go to the early service...that changed with Luke coughing all night long and Brady waking up with a cough as well. We decided we shouldn't put the kids in their Sunday school class like that...so we spent the morning at home. We started working on Luke's "Kung Fu Panda" cupcakes, I got to exercise, and the morning passed quickly. At noon we went over to mom and dad's. The guys left to play 9 pin bowling, and the girls hung out with the kids. Later that day I got a walk in with Andy. It was a nice day spent with mom and dad, Zach and Mindy, and all the kids.

Today is cold and windy with some snow flurries. :( I'm ready for my Florida trip! In the meantime, I'm continuing to gather stuff for our Memorial weekend garage sale, and trying to keep the house orderly just in case someone comes for a showing!

Hope

Last night Andy and I decided to go to Lifegroup...his track practice was cancelled due to weather so he was home early and we were able to all go together! (and get there on time!) Apparently this was all God-coordinated. Let me explain...

Yesterday morning Andy's mom called him to tell him she had been diagnosed with a rare form of liver cancer. I was unaware until Andy called me that afternoon. Without many details yet, we were just trying to process the initial news. Although we were both exhausted we felt like being with our friends, so we headed out to Lifegroup. It was good to be with our group again and just hang out. After dinner we watched a Louie Giglio film called "Hope." The message was awesome and perfectly timed with the news we were trying to digest. To sum up, Louie's message was that when the bottom drops out of your life, when things look really bad, we have to go back to the cross. When we feel like maybe God doesn't care about us, when we question why things are happening to us, we need to go back to the cross. Because the cross is where Jesus proved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He loves us. What could be more proof than to die for someone and to secure their future? He has experienced all kinds of pain and can relate to the trouble we have in our lives. Jesus told us that in this life we would have trouble...but in Him, and Him alone, we can find peace. That is where you go when life gets hard...really hard.

Wow! So am I saying that God coordinated the weather so that practice was cancelled so that Andy came home early so that we could go to Lifegroup and they picked "Hope" to play that night...just for us? Well...maybe not just for us...but He sure is good at working things together to give us exactly what we need when we need it. How great is our God!!!??!!! We ended the night with the support of friends and prayer...and we couldn't ask for anything more.

We are still waiting to find out more information about Andy's mom. As we come to mind, please pray for her and whatever treatment lies ahead. As Louie said, we have freedom in this life, but life is NEVER out of God's control.

random

She is smiling now...hard to catch her at it, but this one was a start!

Skinny little bean.

The past few weeks have been busy around here. We've been working like crazy on the house and now are getting to where it feels really clean and nice! Its a good feeling. As soon as I get a flyer done, I'm putting out the for sale signs! And for those of you who are wondering...we are sticking around. Our plan was to live in this house for 2 years, then sell and build again. Although the market is not great, we thought we'd at least give it a go. If it doesn't happen, we are still in a great place and a great house. As Brady might say, "no biggie."

Last night I took Brady to kindergarten round-up. It was just strange. There are a lot of things we are thinking through for next year. I always thought I'd home school for the first three years...but his school is small and he would have a nice small class. However, kindergarten here is 5 full days this coming year and I don't like that. Five years old seems very young to send him off for most of his waking hours. I am a stay-at-home mom because I believe strongly in the value of home time for young kids...and I'm not ready to give that up completely. Anyway, there is much more to this, but I won't go into it now. Please pray for us as we consider everything involved in what to do with Brady next fall.

We recently ran out of diapers for Luke and decided not to buy any more. It seems that potty training him has seriously dragged out for a year, so we are going to torture ourselves for a few days and see how it goes. Needless to say that means more laundry and cleaning for me. I'd say he's at about 80%. His birthday is this coming weekend and it has really snuck up on me. With no trip to Denver planned, and no presents, we might just have to postpone his birthday for another weekend...not that he would know. We'll see.

The boys have a new skill. I'm going to have to get it on video. There is a book that they love right now, "Roar of a Snore." They both know it so well that between the two of them they can quote it from start to finish...with or without the book in front of them! It is particularly amazing and funny when they finish each other's lines....for example: Luke might say, "I'll be hornswoggled!" and Brady says, "Jack Huffle cried." And they continue like that through the book. Great memories!

Jolee is doing great. I am so addicted to her smiles. She is kinda in that awkward stage where she wants to be awake but can't really do anything...I think sometimes she cries out of boredom. Although she really doesn't cry much at all. She is great!

Birthday weekend

Andy's birthday was last Thursday. I invited my parents over and when he got home from track practice we grilled steaks, had cheesy potatoes, green beans, and birthday cake. It was good! Andy opened his presents...a movie, some grill utensils, and a few new Wii games. It was a fun evening together. Although Andy thought that was it...we had much more planned for the weekend.

Friday was a busy day with Jolee's two month checkup...she is doing great! Although not yet on the chart for weight, she is gaining and looking good. She has yet to catch up to either of the boys' birth weights though! I thought it was funny when the nurse called her petite...we just don't hear that in our family, but I loved it! I got permission to start "stretching her out" at night...so hopefully soon we'll all be getting more sleep. After her appointment (45 minutes away) we came home...it was a beautiful day so I grabbed Brady and we went for a walk. Luke and Jolee stayed with daddy. It was a fun time to talk with my oldest and enjoy him by myself. It was good exercise for my still pathetic muscles too. Next came naps and daddy had to run off to his dentist appointment. When everybody got up we rushed off to the soccer dome for Brady's soccer clinic. It is so fun to watch him...he is doing great for a 4-year-old! We left a few minutes early to get the boys to the church for Awana. Andy, Jolee and I headed home for some free time. Its always nice to have a little time to ourselves. What a busy day!

Saturday Andy was up and gone to the track meet before we woke up. It was a super long day for me with the three kids...Jolee was fussy from the 5 shots she had on Friday. Brady was throwing a fit at everything I said to him...and Luke was his normal up and down self. It sure felt like all three kids cried ALL day. I put them down early for naps...actually Brady got put down for two naps (it was that bad). When they got up I fed Jolee and we rushed off to the church to finish the derby cars. Andy joined us about 45 minutes later and I was soooo thankful. We stayed at the church until about 7:30...working on the cars, had a yummy spaghetti dinner, and watched a movie. Thankfully the distractions helped the kids behave a bit better. In between all this I kept trying to clean the house without attracting too much attention. I knew what was coming up!

Sunday morning we were all up early and headed to the early service for church. The boys did well in their class and Jolee slept through the service so it was all very enjoyable and good for the soul. After church we made our usual grocery stop and then headed home. I was scurrying around cleaning and trying not to be too picky...thankfully Andy didn't think anything of it. We put the boys down for a nap and at 2 things started happening. People started showing up at our house...Andy was completely surprised and didn't know what was going on! After about 15 people had gathered I said happy birthday! This is all for you and they are going to keep coming! He was so surprised. We had cake and hung out for about 2 1/2 hours with friends and family. Tons of people came and the house was hopping for the entire time. It was great to see so much love for my hubby! When the party wound down, we packed up the Wii and headed to part 2 of the party. Our friends opened their home and I had invited a few guys to join Andy in a Wii competition. The boys went to my parents' for the night. We had pizza, pop, and cupcakes and played the Wii until about 9:30pm. It was awesome! Then Andy and I headed home and watched a movie. It was a great day.

One prayer request for the week...Brady is having some unexplained bleeding so he is going through a bunch of tests this week. I also have a friend undergoing a double mastectomy on Thursday...she has 3 kids and is very young. Please pray for her!

April happenings

Awana cars

Well, let me start with a request...Baby Jolee could once again use all of her prayer warriors out there. She has developed a yucky cough and a low-grade fever. Since she is still so young and so little this is a little concerning. I took her to the pediatrician yesterday (Monday) and she tested negative for RSV...PRAISE the Lord! The bad news is that there really isn't much to do for her except comfort her the best we can. Her cough is fairly persistent and when she gets going her whole body is involved. She usually coughs until she gags, and then spits up. Its so sad...please pray that her immune system would work the way God designed it to, that her cough would ease, and she would be able to keep her milk down. Poor baby girl!

Now for the family update...

Last week was spring break for Andy and it was SO nice to have him home with us all week! We spent the week mostly inside since it snowed until Friday. Our plan was to work on the house...my job was to go through pretty much everything and weed out stuff for a garage sale, clean closets, move the boys' room to the basement and set up Jolee's room, and generally clean the house. Andy's job was to work on finishing the house...trim, grout, etc. We did pretty well...still have a ways to go, but we had a few interruptions during the week. One major one was taking the boys to the doctor for coughs and sore throats on Monday. Then Monday night Luke was breathing so poorly he started thrashing around and panicking. Andy took him to the ER around 11pm and didn't come home until around 4 am. It was a long night for everyone. Luke ended up with x-rays, a steroid shot, nebulizer treatments, and sent home with oxygen. Poor Andy had to pretty much pin him down at the ER so he could get the medicine. Not fun! That kind of knocked us out for the next day...we were exhausted and Luke was still needing a lot of care and attention. Thankfully he is doing much better now...just has a lingering cough.

During the week one of our fun projects was to work on the boys' Awana Derby cars. They each had picked one of their toy cars to duplicate. Andy did the woodwork and I was amazed at how great they came out! I did the painting with some help from the boys. It was a fun family project. We get to race in a couple weeks.

Friday was a fun day because we got to take Brady to his first soccer practice! A friend had passed us their old shin guards and soccer socks, and his cousin gave him his old cleats. I found a shirt with a soccer ball on it and Brady was all decked out! He wasn't too sure at first, but once he got all his gear on and got out there, you know he loved it! It was fun to see him in a new situation...learning to follow directions, do practice drills, and interact with players and a coach. He could actually dribble really well and of course he loved to run. A bit like his dad :)

The week came to a close on Sunday when we made it to church (yahoo!) and then to the playground. It was an absolutely BEAUTIFUL day...warm sunshine...its amazing how the weather can put me in a good mood. We played for over an hour and saw several friends there too! It was the most social thing I've done in awhile!

Now I'm adjusting again to caring for the kids by myself during the day. Things are getting much better...and if the boys would be little angels and obey all the time it would be a piece of cake! :) I am really looking forward to warm weather where we can get out more and release some pent-up energy.

Resurrection Sunday!

Perhaps she likes dresses as much as her mom does????

Is that a dimple I see?

Our little baby doll.

How our day started...in warm PJs

Brady in his Pj's...playing the Wii (we borrowed a new game)

Our hard worker...shoveling the snow this morning.

Dipping eggs

Today did not start out as planned...as we woke up to yet more snow and the boys had coughs and bad sore throats. Luke pretty much screamed until the Tylenol kicked in. So, although we were up in time we did not make it to church. Instead we watched Dr. David Jeremiah on TV while eating cinnamon rolls and wearing our Pj's. I had a ham in the crock pot and had bought some other pre-made items for dinner. I did make apple spinach salad and an apple pie. The boys colored some Easter eggs and we read The Legend of the Easter Egg...the lesson being that just as a chick breaks out of an egg, so did Jesus break out of the tomb! We also got out the children's picture Bible and read the crucifixion through the resurrection. After a good meal we all settled in for a good nap. All in all its been a good day. I even gave Jolee a bath and played dress-up to take some pictures!

Random

I know posts without pictures are kinda lame, but that is the way this one is going to go. Jolee met her Grandma and Grandpa P. this past weekend. The trip didn't exactly go as planned because of airport delays, but they were still able to spend 2 1/2 days with us. We stayed in Denver at a really nice motel...swimming pool, game room, breakfast... It was a bit tiring for me to be away from home, but was a nice vacation for the boys. I ended up pulling/popping something inside by my incision...lets just say that didn't feel good, and still doesn't. I go to the doctor on Friday for my 6 week check.

Brady has been invited to three birthday parties recently...I think we are beginning a new phase with his friends. He is already talking about his 5th birthday and making plans and requests. He sure is growing up! Last night this was part of his prayer..."thank you that we are almost teenagers. Please help me to grow so I can be a kindergartner." He is all about being bigger, faster, stronger. I'm playing some kids Christian music this morning and love that Brady is learning the songs and sings while he plays.

Luke has recently been reverting to his old mischievous ways...I mean really bad. I've found him eating Brady's scar cream, removing his diaper and applying Vaseline and powder himself...to himself and nearly everything around him, opening his closet, removing the clothes from the shelves and climbing up as high as he can get to try to reach the toys at the top (the ones that have been put away for a reason), pulling a stool up to the stove and microwave and pushing buttons, climbing on top of the counter to reach things on top of the fridge....I think I could go on and on. And all this is within the past week. I've got to find new locks and new hiding places. When he is quiet I'll call out, "Luke, what are you doing?" When his response is, "I don't know" then I know I'm in trouble.

Jolee is looking like a newborn now! :) The past few days I've given up pumping in the middle of the night and just nurse her. Its working pretty well. Maybe there will be a day when I can pack up the pump for good! She set a new record today (I guess she must know she is now 6 weeks old). She played on her blanket for nearly 45 minutes! She really loves being held and being on her tummy.

Chocolate Whipped Frosting!

Yesterday Jolee turned one month old! As you can see she still doesn't fit into 0-3 month clothes, and is not even close to the size 0 baby shoes Aunt Courtney sent! She was calling Leila to say she hopes her tummy feels better. :) I can't believe its been a month...where did the time go? I made a cake with chocolate whipped frosting yesterday to celebrate (something I craved ever since my diabetes diagnosis), but I was so exhausted that I fell asleep before I had a chance to enjoy any. :(

Lets see...changes over the past month:

Jolee is awake a bit more, although still sleeps most of the time.

She has gained weight...I couldn't accurately weigh her yesterday, but if she tracked the same as she did the previous week she would be 6 lbs 10 oz. or so.

Her little legs have filled out a bit...she used to have 4 skin folds (just skin), and now her leg has smoothed out!

There is the tiniest little pudge under her chin :)

She is transitioning slowly to nursing...about twice a day successfully now.

Her tiny little squeak has developed into a tiny little cry.

I'm discovering that she actually likes tummy time and it usually settles her down!

She is still not strong enough to sit in the bouncy seat and is still working on picking her head up.

She still has that soft baby fuzz that is supposed to fall off in the womb for full-term babies.

Her eyes are still that dark murky blue...wonder what they will change to?!

She has graduated from preemie diapers to newborns!

She is too long now for preemie clothes, but still swims in some newborns. Someone should tell clothing makers that not all babies are as wide as they are long! By the way, it is soooo strange to put 0-3 month clothes away to grow into...what??!!! At one month I was putting the boys 0-3 clothes away for good!

It was a little hard to measure, but I think she has sprouted to 20 1/2"!!! Tall and skinny!

Her head circ. started at 12 1/2" and is now just over 13".

Oh, and she can be crying and carrying on, but as soon as I pick her up she just about passes out. I love that she is that easy!

Tomorrow is her actual due date...and look at all that God has done! What a great God we serve!